An intermediate amount of eye contact will suggest your courage and willingness to stand up for yourself. Staring is often perceived as aggressive. Make intermittent eye contact with the person you're confronting.If you can't take a break while under pressure, try these steps: When you return to the situation you'll be refreshed and better able to approach it with a new mind and an assertive rather than aggressive approach. I'll return in a few minutes and talk with you about what happened." Time out sessions are wonderful ways of interrupting your anger process. Disengage with a polite statement, such as "I'm upset now. If you find yourself getting too hot you may be able to excuse yourself for a short 'time out' during which you go through the anger management steps outlined above. You may have more time to respond then you think you have.
You may not really have to respond quickly. This perception of pressure may itself be an illusion, supported by the intense arousal you feel as a result of your anger. Often, in the heat of an angering situation, you can feel that things are happening too fast and that you don't have time to follow these anger management steps. Work to come up with an assertive response rather than an aggressive one.
Reflect and try to identify the emotional trigger that has set you off.Practice deep breathing and/or repeat a relaxation cue (for example, repeating the word calm or cool ) to yourself if you have the opportunity.If imagery helps you, imagine a big red stop sign. Immediately stop how you are thinking and acting at the first sign you are getting angry.
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